Self-Help Steps, Expectations, and Resolve

So, last week I joined the provincial Writers' Federation, which is a good move both professionally and personally. Writers' unions play an important role. They have resources and hold events that bring the writing community together as well as out into the rest of the world. The act of joining is also a step forward on a personal level: after all, it's writers who join, so that's what I must be, right?

Ah, but I've been darn sure of that for a long while now. So, why didn't I join until last week? This is something I probably need a couch, $125/hour and a nodding doctor to figure out. I'm not going to let it trouble me (thus saving $125). The bottom line is that I'm a union girl now. I'm branded. I'm committed to the cause. I fly the colours.

The act of writing is as basic as breathing for me. What's not natural is all the stuff around it. Even after the book, I still find myself questioning whether I belong in writers' circles:

Do I have enough to say?
Really, I barely shut up. 

Do I have the written goods?
Do the others? Okay, yes. Some. Not everybody, though. 

Will I fit in?
Seriously? They're writers. Nobody fits in. That's why they write.

But the tendencies that have me questioning my right to join the union are exactly why I need to be part of it. I need to do all the stuff around writing that makes it work and that's what unions do. They get writers to connect, network, promote, engage and do the business it takes to keep getting published.

We'll see.
Sigh.

***

Why do I always choose spiderwebs to represent my writing…?
We know why.